Ok, here’s a decidedly much more transparent post (and perhaps quite raw, random, and chaotic). But I’m keeping it real! Not that it matters as I’m not sure anyone is actually reading this. Ha!

Read some today on the weaknesses of ENFPs and it startled me. Much of my behavior is in there! For example, it is VERY common for ENFPs to be angry -> bitter hatred if someone judges them. This stems from the ENFPs deep seated desire to listen to everyone and our trusting nature. And when we are betrayed we HATE it. It helps to know that it’s not just my problem but my personality type. I share this characteristic with millions of others. But that doesn’t make it the end. It’s not a “just the way it is” type situation. It’s still a substantial weakness. What do I do now? It makes me think of the Spirit controlled temperments book. It deals with different archetypes, but the message is still relevant that it’s the Holy Spirit that can make the difference. I can change. I can feel the challenge of this change. It’s been a LONG time in coming.

Having said that, the true challenge is not truly in accomplish a bunch of tasks. No! The challenge is maintain the balance grasshopper. Regardless of how pragmatically efficient I may ever become it will not mean that I will be a capitalist pundit, a mindless worker bee, a worshipper at the altar of freneticism, or any such thing. The challenge will be to not lose my soul. Not to lose my sense of wonder at life and my center of peace.

Work is necessary and extremely important! Again, the Benedictine motto is inspirational: Ora et Labora. Prayer and Work. We need a balance of both. Work, yes. But also reflective worship and spiritual life. And I dare say that the many of the church fathers and mothers were so good at this that they could do both at the same time harmoniously.

Well, ok, that’s the bar…and it’s set high. That’s what being the man of steel will mean for me. To change my life to be more structured, proactive, organized…and shunning procrastination. All the while, not losing my sense of balance and heart of peace.

But maybe that’s the deeper message here, is that heart of peace. Or heart of Shalom…God life. Yeah…I’ve lost that for a while.

Dear God, help me to continue on this path of active life, active giving. But help me not to lose sight of you. Give me discernment.
Seek first the Kingdom…remember? That’s where the heart of peace comes.

What’s the word say that is the precursor of the “then the peace of God will protect your hearts and minds in Christ Jesus”. Is that Philippians? My mind is so fuzzy. It is Philippians! 4:7 to be exact. It is the passage that says “Be anxious for nothing, but in EVERYTHING, with PRAYER and supplication make your needs be known to God…”. That’s when the peace comes. Awesome.

Perhaps one final thought, maybe there is too much angst. Too much striving. Rick, my former mentor once told me that even if you mess up God will find you. Don’t worry about that. Very cool guy.

Ok, not the final thought. Don’t fear people …FEAR GOD! That means putting Him first. Woship Him and seek Him first and all the other stuff falls into place. Yeah, I like that…